Getting to the ‘aha!’ moment: 10 ways to embrace discomfort and pain when you study


We live in a world where comfort is king. A world where we think pain is bad. Pleasure is good.

Following this logic, we should avoid pain and pursue pleasure at all costs.

But is this the recipe for academic and life success?
Surely life can’t be all ponies, kittens and rainbows all the time?

Learning anything new usually (but not always) comes with a dollop of pain, discomfort and confusion.

So when it comes to the learning process, you want to make friends with pain and discomfort. They will be your allies in building and shaping a rock solid brain.

Why embrace pain and discomfort in learning?

Regular visits from pain and discomfort can fast track and deepen your learning. Not only that, they can help you build a more resilient mindset and stay calm and collected in challenging times.

As author Mark Manson states:

“Who you are is defined by what you’re willing to struggle for. People who enjoy the struggles of a gym are the ones who run triathlons and have chiseled abs and can benchpress a small house…people who enjoy the stresses and uncertainties of the starving artist lifestyle are the ones who live it and make it.”

Pain is a normal (and necessary) part of life. So it’s how we handle this pain that matters most.

Interpret the pain as a sign that you’re stupid? You’re more likely to give up.
See pain as a sign that you’re on the right track? You’re more likely to keep going.

Here are some strategies to help minimise pain and handle pain more effectively when you’re learning:

1. Talk to your brain

Next time pain strikes, psyche yourself up with some positive self talk (“You can do this!”).

Alternatively, you can try having a conversation with your brain. For instance, you could say:

“Hey brain, I know this work is a little challenging. I know you’re hurting right now, but let’s keep at it for a bit longer. If after 15 minutes you’re still hurting, we can have a break.”

2. Understand that the pain won’t last forever

When it comes to learning, things are usually most painful at the beginning. But if you keep going, at some point one of two things typically happen:

1) You get used to the pain (and it won’t feel so bad)
2) The pain dissipates

In moments when your brain hurts, remind yourself that it won’t last forever.

3. Work like a sprinter (sprint-rest recovery pattern)

The idea of working like a sprinter is simple: you work in a short focused burst (25 minutes), followed by a break (5 – 10 minutes).

Go for a walk, watch a movie, crank up some music and dance around the house, have a bath, etc. A little space away from the subject can provide a fresh perspective.

Here’s the great thing: while you’re on your break, your brain is still unconsciously working away on the complex information even though you’re not actively focusing on it (this is called diffuse mode thinking).

4. Pretend to be 5 years old

Whenever my brain is hurting and I’m feeling overwhelmed, I go back to basics. I get my hands on children’s books or graphic novels on the subject. Often these resources explain ideas in a clear and concise way.

You can also access “Explain like I’m five” on Reddit. This is a section where you can post a question on a complex topic and receive a simple explanation from others.

5. Lighten your load

Just tackle one idea at a time (and give yourself plenty of time to do this). Unsubscribe from the idea of mastering all the material in one sitting. Research shows that studying in short bursts is more effective than one long cramming session.

6. Get used to reading things multiple times

Paul Edwards from The University of Michigan School of Information has developed a great resource called How to read a book, v5.0. In this resource, he recommends reading a book (or article) three times.

First reading: for overview and discovery
Second reading: for detail and understanding
Third reading: for note-taking in your own words

Just keep in mind it’s more effective to let a little time pass in between each reading.

I like to mind map out the material on the second or third reading but that’s a personal preference. Do what works for you.

7. YouTube (and other resources) to the rescue

You’ve read the chapter three times. You’ve read the children’s edition. But you’re still not getting it. What do you do?

Whatever you do, don’t despair. Stress and frustration will only make it harder for you to learn.

You’ve got a couple of options:

1) Check out YouTube and Khan Academy videos on the topic (but stay on task)
2) Look for other books on the topic

All it takes is one good book or video where a topic is presented in a slightly different way and then…bam! Finally, you get it.

8. Know when to stop

You wouldn’t continue to run a marathon if you twisted your ankle or experienced severe chest pains. So why continue studying if the pain is unbearable?

While a little pain is good for your brain, too much pain and frustration can shut down key parts of your brain that are critical for learning.

So you need to know when to take a break. This can be hard to do if you’re in front of the screen and you’ve been screen sucked. But knowing when you need to stop can save you hours of unnecessary pain and confusion.

9. Do something small to get a sense of mastery

You’re just not getting it. You’ve decided to take a break to clear your mind. What do you do on your break?

Do something to generate a sense of mastery. Keep the task small and simple. It could be cleaning your desk, taking out the rubbish, or baking a cake. This is what I call ‘productive procrastination’ (Note: not all procrastination is bad).

10. Ask your teacher or a tutor for help

At this point, you’ve exhausted all avenues. You’ve wrestled with the ideas and you’re still confused. Now it’s time to reach out for help.

Write down specifically what you’re struggling with and go talk to your teacher. I get that it takes courage to do this. As Brene Brown says it’s a brave act to admit you feel lost and you’re struggling. But if you come armed with a specific question, it may make all the difference to your learning experience.

Your ‘aha!’ moment will be around the corner. It’s coming. You just need to stay strong. Persevere. Keep pushing through the pain. You’ve got this!

What do you do when you experience pain and discomfort when you study? Do you tend to avoid the pain? What could you do differently next time you experience some discomfort? Feel free to leave a comment below!

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Exams are an intense experience.

This means you need to prepare yourself mentally and physically for them.

You can work so hard to memorise large quantities of information for an exam, but if you’re not mentally and physically prepared, all that hard work can sadly go to waste.

When it comes time to take your exams, you have to relate to yourself as a professional athlete. Leading up to the day of the big performance (i.e. the exam), you need to eat nutritious food, be in the right frame of mind, manage your nerves, and allow your body to rest. These simple things can make all the difference to your exam performance.

You may be thinking “But isn’t this just common sense?”

It is! But creating healthy habits takes time and practice.

It’s one thing to intellectually know you should be eating well but it’s another thing altogether to incorporate healthy meals and snacks into your lifestyle.

I see a lot of students drinking energy drinks, getting very little sleep, and eating highly processed foods in the days leading up to exams. I have to admit, there was a time when I engaged in these behaviours too. I can tell you from personal experience, this is a recipe for mediocre grades and a miserable existence.

Here are my top 10 tips to prevent burnout and boost exam performance:

1. Prioritise sleep

Sleep is critical to the learning process, exam performance, and wellbeing. Yet it’s usually the first thing students sacrifice to get more study done.

If you miss two hours of sleep each night for a week, the cognitive effects are as bad as going without sleep for two days straight!

Studies have also found that if you stay awake for 18 hours straight that’s like having a blood alcohol level of 0.05. In other words, it’s like being legally drunk. Your ability to focus, think, and learn will be seriously impaired.

You can’t adapt to getting less sleep. As adolescents, you need about 9-10 hours of sleep per night to be as alert as possible when you wake up.

If that feels unachievable, try to just get an extra 15 minutes of sleep tonight. Gradually increase this each night until you reach your target.

2. Incorporate movement breaks into your study sessions

Often students stop exercising when they start preparing for exams. They think “I don’t have time to exercise!”. It’s as if they think they must spend every moment studying. Don’t fall into this trap.

Movement is your friend when it comes to studying for exams.

Research shows engaging in regular physical movement will help you to study more effectively. Firstly, it’s a great way to relieve stress and release feel good chemicals. Secondly, it gets the blood flowing more efficiently to your brain, which can give you a cognitive boost.

One study found students who engaged in 5 minute movement breaks every 17 minutes during a lecture retained more information and could focus better.

Every time you engage in a short movement break, you’re enhancing your study sessions.

3. Eat a healthy breakfast

Research has found that students who skip breakfast experience a decrease in cognitive performance and alertness compared to students who eat breakfast.

Eating a nutritious breakfast will give you a cognitive boost before an exam. It will also help you to feel fuller for longer, stabilise your mood, and give you plenty of energy to get through the exam.

Here are some healthy breakfast ideas:

  • Muesli or porridge with nuts and fresh fruit (e.g., berries)
  • Wholemeal toast with a variety of toppings (e.g., baked beans, tomatoes, and avocado) and a piece of fruit
  • A healthy homemade smoothie (click here for my brain boosting smoothie recipe)
  • Breakfast smoothie recipe

    4. Drink plenty of water

    Your brain requires adequate hydration to function properly. Drinking water ensures that your brain receives the necessary fluids to perform tasks efficiently, such as retaining information and problem-solving.

    Take regular sips of water as you study. It’s a good idea to have a glass of water or a reusable drink bottle within arms reach.

    You may even want to create a tiny habit to remind yourself to engage in this simple behaviour (e.g., “After I finish answering a practice exam question, I will take a sip of water”).

    5. Remember, your teachers want you to do well

    Many years ago, I started thinking that my teachers and lecturers were out to get me. I thought they would mark me down wherever they got the chance. As a result of this distorted thinking, I became too scared to write anything in one of my first tests at law school. After receiving a terrible grade (5%), my brother said to me:

    “Remember sis, your teachers want you to do well. They will try to give you marks wherever they can. It’s in their best interest to do so.”

    Don’t worry about writing a perfect answer. If you’re unsure, be brave and still write something down. Even if it’s just a few dot points, it’s better than nothing. You may not get any marks for it, but your teachers won’t take marks off.

    Just remember, most of the time your teachers are on your side and they want you to succeed. When you do well, it makes them look good.

    6. Focus on what you know

    Chances are there will always be something that you could have studied more thoroughly come the day of your exam. But on the morning of an exam, you can’t do much about that, so there’s no point worrying. Worrying will just deplete your finite energy, which you need to conserve for the exam.

    Instead of worrying, try saying this to yourself before each exam:

    “I now know so much more than I did before. I’ll be able to answer many questions in this exam.”

    Telling yourself this positive micro-thought will allow you to enter the exam in a calm and confident frame of mind.

    7. Avoid things and people that trigger anxiety

    It’s normal to feel a bit nervous before an exam. But there are certain things and people that can push your anxiety levels into dangerous territory and impair your exam performance.

    For example, coffee and energy drinks will skyrocket your stress levels. Similarly, hanging out with people who have a lot of nervous energy and are venting about the exam (“I’m going to fail!” and “I hardly studied!”) are going to leave you feeling distracted and a little jangled.

    Before the exam, do your best to isolate yourself from these people. If you’re worried about offending someone who is venting to you, you could say “I’m sorry but I really need to do some last minute cramming”. Then proceed to pull out your notes and pretend to read them.

    8. Mentally disconnect from the exam when it’s over

    How many times have you stayed back after an exam to talk to your friends about what you put for each question? Have you ever felt terrible after doing this?

    It can be reassuring to know that you wrote the same answer as your friends. But if you find out that you wrote something completely different, you may start to second guess yourself. If you have another four or five exams to go, this may throw you off your game.

    This is why I don’t recommend engaging in a postmortem of the exam until you get your results/exam paper back.

    When you walk out of the exam room, tell yourself:

    “That exam is over. There’s nothing I can do to change how I went. It’s time to move on!”.

    You could imagine yourself locking the exam in a box and throwing it off a cliff or rolling it up and stuffing it in a bottle and throwing it out to sea. The point is you need to mentally disconnect from that exam and focus on studying for the next one.

    9. Engage in the Box Breathing Technique when you get stuck

    If you come across a question that you’re not sure how to answer, stop for a moment and take a few deep breaths (in for the count of 4 and out for the count of 4).

    A simple breath activity you can try is the Box Breathing Technique. This involves imagining yourself breathing along the sides of a box (breathing in for the count of four on one side, out for the count of four on the next side, etc). Repeat this 2-3 times. Then take a look at the question again.

    If you are still unsure how to answer the question, move on to another question.

    The worst thing you can do is panic (remember, stress impairs your ability to think and recall information).

    By engaging in Box Breathing, you can help yourself to remain in a calm and stable state.

    10. Dealing with writer’s cramp

    Many of us are familiar with writer’s cramp. This can be caused by gripping onto your pen too tightly. Try loosening your grip a little.

    Alternatively, experiment with a range of different pens. Some biros require you to press down hard on the page to make a mark, but not gel pens. The ink just flows onto the page!

    The reality is, even with a good gel pen, your elbow will start to hurt at some point if you’re taking a 3 hour exam. When it does start to hurt, have a rest for a few seconds (yes, you have time to do this). Stretch your arm out. Shake it a little.

    Treat each exam like a mountain hike rather than a 100 metre sprint. Resting for a few moments here and there will be time well spent and will enhance your overall performance.

    To sum up

    These simple strategies can help to elevate your exam performance. My advice is to start small. Even if your exams are several weeks away, select one or two of these ideas and start testing them out today. At first, the strategies will require a bit of mental effort. But like anything in life, if you persevere they’ll become second nature to you and they’ll just be things you do without even thinking.

    Want to learn more exam strategies? Click here to download a free copy of 70 ways to ace your exams.

    Control your dopamine

    Do you know someone who is super motivated?

    About 10 years ago I met the beloved Australian celebrity Costa Georgiardis from the television show Gardening Australia.

    I was blown away by Costa’s energy and enthusiasm.

    He was exactly like he appeared on TV. But he wasn’t hamming it up for the camera. Costa was the real deal.

    He was high on life.

    Costa

    I’ve heard that people often ask Costa “Why are you so energetic?”, “Why are you so up?”, and “Don’t you get tired?”

    Some people feel tired just being around Costa (check out this video to get a sense of Costa’s energy).

    This got me thinking . . .

    What’s the difference between motivated and energised people and less motivated people who struggle to get off the couch?

    According to Stanford professor Dr Andrew Huberman the difference has everything to do with dopamine.

    In this blog post, I want to explore how dopamine works and how you can adjust your dopamine levels to experience more motivation, focus, and energy in a safe and healthy way. Let’s go!

    What is dopamine? And why does it matter?

    Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that is involved in reward processing. Your brain releases this molecule whenever it anticipates a reward.

    In a healthy brain and environment, dopamine plays an important role in keeping you motivated, focused, and on track with your goals.

    Unfortunately, this natural feedback system can be hijacked by big tech companies and fast food corporations.

    There are two types of dopamine: tonic and phasic

    Tonic dopamine is your baseline level of dopamine that circulates through your system. People who are generally enthusiastic and motivated have a high baseline dopamine. But if you struggle with motivation and often feel lethargic, chances are you have a low baseline dopamine.

    But then there’s phasic dopamine. This is where you experience peaks in dopamine above your baseline level. These peaks occur as a result of engaging in certain behaviours and/or consuming certain substances.

    For example, social media companies train users to seek out quick, easy, and frequent hits of dopamine. Fast food companies engineer foods that have just the right amount of salt, fat and/or sugar to release big spikes in dopamine. This make you want to eat more of the food product and keep going back for more.

    What goes up must come down

    It’s important to understand that these peaks in dopamine don’t last.

    After engaging in a dopamine-rich activity, you will experience an inevitable drop in dopamine. And this drop will be below your baseline level.

    It should come as no surprise that when you’re in a dopamine deficit state you don’t feel very good. You experience pain and discomfort.

    What is this pain and discomfort all about?

    According to Psychiatrist Dr Anna Lembke this is our brain’s way of trying to bring everything back into balance and establish homeostasis.

    In the book Dopamine Nation Dr Lembke talks about how pleasure and pain are experienced in overlapping regions of the brain. She states:

    “Pleasure and pain work like a balance”.

    If you tip to the side of pleasure or pain, self regulatory mechanisms kick in to bring everything back into balance.

    But you never want to tip to one side for too long. Dr Lembke states:

    “With repeated exposure to the same or similar pleasure stimulus, the initial deviation to the side of pleasure gets weaker and shorter and the after-response to the side of pain gets stronger and longer, a process scientists call neuroadaptation . . . we need more of the drug of choice to get the same effect.”

    In other words, consuming more of a dopamine-rich substance or behaviour is bad for your brain. It will leave you in a dopamine-deficit-state.

    And when you’re in this state, it’s much harder to do your school work.

    How you can better manage your dopamine

    There are a number of simple things you can do to regenerate your dopamine receptors and increase your baseline dopamine. I’ve listed several strategies below.

    1. Avoid pre-rewards and extrinsic rewards

    Before you start your work or study, you want to avoid engaging in activities that will cause spikes in dopamine. If you watch TikTok videos or play video games before sitting down to do your homework, this is going to make your work feel a lot more painful and boring.

    Here’s why . . .

    Dr Huberman states that how motivated you feel to do a task depends on your current dopamine levels and what previous peaks in dopamine you have experienced. This is important to understand because with this knowledge, you can create routines and habits to conserve your dopamine and motivation for pursuing your goals.

    With this in mind, I’ve recently simplified my morning routine in the following ways:

    • I don’t start the day by looking at my phone or computer
    • I exercise without listening to music
    • I have a healthy breakfast of overnight oats and berries rather than a super sweet smoothie
    • I have a cold shower (more on why I do this below)

    Whilst this may sound boring, it’s had a dramatic impact on how easy it is for me to get stuck into doing my work.

    2. Take a dopamine detox

    The term ‘Dopamine Detox’ is a little misleading since it’s technically not possible to detox from dopamine. Nevertheless, the idea is a good one.

    When you engage in a dopamine detox, you’re taking a break from engaging in dopamine-rich activities (e.g., consuming junk food, going on social media, and watching Netflix). This will give your dopamine receptors a chance to regenerate.

    After taking a dopamine detox, you’ll probably notice that simple things like eating basic wholefoods or going for a walk are much more pleasurable. As Dr Huberman points out:

    “Our perception for dopamine is heightened when our dopamine receptors haven’t seen much dopamine lately.”

    3. Embrace the pain of a cold shower

    Research shows that cold water therapy (i.e., being submerged in cold water) can increase your dopamine by 250% above your baseline level.

    Let’s put that in context:

    Chocolate increases dopamine by 150% above baseline
    Alcohol increases dopamine by 200% above baseline
    Nicotine increases dopamine by 225% above baseline
    Cocaine increases dopamine by 350% above baseline
    Amphetamines increases dopamine by 1100%

    You need to remember that these peaks in dopamine are followed by a sudden crash below your baseline level. Let’s not overlook the fact that chronic substance abuse causes brain damage and can be fatal.

    Unlike other addictive substances, cold showers create peaks in dopamine that can last for several hours. You also don’t experience the subsequent dramatic crash below your baseline level.

    Word of warning: Before you turn on the cold shower tap or start running an ice-bath, it’s important to be aware that people can go into shock when plunging themselves into cold water. Please be careful!

    4. Get high from exercise

    If cold showers aren’t really your thing, try increasing your dopamine with exercise. Exercise has been found to increase dopamine by 130% above your baseline level.

    In the book Move The Body, Heal The Mind, neuroscientist Dr Jennifer Heisz says:

    “Exercise increases dopamine and repopulates dopamine receptors to help the brain heal faster during recovery [from addiction]. Although all forms of exercise can do this, runner’s high may do it best.”

    5. Create friction points

    Look for ways to make it harder to engage in the dopamine-rich activities. Create barriers and/or friction points to stop you from mindlessly seeking quick shots of dopamine.

    For example, I recently noticed I had a problem with compulsively checking my phone. Whenever I felt bored or lonely, I’d check my phone to see if I’d received any messages. I didn’t like the fact I was doing this but I found it hard to stop. What could I do?

    I could use a dumb phone.

    I found a ‘seniors’ flip phone that allowed me to do basic things like make calls and send texts. But sending texts is not easy! I have to type in each letter and change from upper to lower case. It really puts you off wanting to text your friends.

    Since switching to a dumb phone, the number of times I touch my phone each day has significantly decreased.

    6. Praise effort

    As you do your work, praise yourself for the effort you’re putting in. Doing this can increase the dopamine you have for the activity.

    Dr Huberman suggests saying the following while you’re doing painful work:

    “I know this is painful. But you need to keep at it. Because it’s painful, it’s going to increase my dopamine later and I’m doing this by choice.”

    To sum up

    We live in a dopamine-rich world. It’s so easy to flood your brain with quick hits of dopamine that feel good in the moment but leave you feeling flat and irritable shortly after. These peaks in dopamine make it harder for us to pursue our goals by undermining our motivation.

    No matter what your current dopamine baseline is, just remember this: you have the ability to increase your dopamine in a healthy and sustainable way. Kick-start the process today!

    Do you enjoy the feeling of crossing an item off your to-do list?

    I love the feeling.

    I think, “Go me! Look at you go!” as I strike the pen through the list item.

    But as good as it feels to cross things off, it’s not really about that. That’s not where the power of lists resides.

    The power exists in making the list in the first place. Getting the thoughts out of your head and down on paper.

    In his book Keep going: 10 ways to stay creative in good times and bad Austin Kleon states:

    “Lists bring order to the chaotic universe. I love making lists. Whenever I need to figure out my life, I make a list. A list gets all your ideas out of your head and clears the mental space so you’re actually able to do something about them.

    When I’m overwhelmed, I fall back on the old-fashioned to-do list. I make a big list of everything that needs to get done, I pick the most pressing thing to do, and I do it. Then I cross it off the list and pick another thing to do. Repeat.”

    Keep going by Austin Kleon

    When I’m feeling really under the pump, I’ll go for a walk and scribble out a list while I’m walking.

    I’m not sure which activity helps me more – the walking or the list making – but by the time I arrive home from my walk, I always feel less anxious and more in control.

    If you haven’t been having much luck with to-do lists, you may have fallen into one of the following common traps:

    1. Fuzzy list items

    If you look at your list and it says says things like ‘Mum’s birthday’ or ‘Study’, it’s time to make these list items crispy.

    Crispy is a Behaviour Design term created by Stanford university Professor BJ Fogg. When you make a behaviour crispy, you get really clear on the specific behaviour you need to carry out.

    Here are some examples I came up with to illustrate the difference between fuzzy and crispy list items:

    Fuzzy to-do list item: Mum’s birthday
    Crispy to-do list item: Call mum to wish her happy birthday after lunch

    Fuzzy to-do list item: Study
    Crispy to-do list item: Open Quizlet study deck and test myself for 5 minutes on the bus

    When you ‘crispify’ a list item, you tighten it up. You make it crystal clear for your brain what you need to do next. This in turn makes it much easier for you to get started.

    2. Your to-list has gone stale

    If your list is no longer working for you, feel free to abandon it and create a new one. As Psychiatrist Douglas Puryear says in his book Your life can be better:

    “I make lists over and over, all day long. It’s not just about having the list; there is also benefit in making them. Writing down what I need to do is somehow calming and organizing, and therefore motivating. When I write things down, it’s as though I’m on top of them.”

    Our brains get bored easily, so try making your list a little bit different every now and then.

    Here are some simple ideas on how you can jazz up your next to-do list:

  • Make a mind map (with each item as a branch)
  • Use a yellow legal pad
  • Write it on a whiteboard (and enjoy wiping off each item)
  • Put each task on a separate post-it note
  • Use a different colour pen
  • Try using an online program like Complice
  • It doesn’t matter what medium or what materials you use to create your to-do list. What matters is that you get everything out of your head and you make each list item crispy.

    3. Your to-do list is making you feel overwhelmed

    Overwhelmed by a long list

    If your to-do list is causing you to have a mini meltdown, back up. Ask yourself . . .

    “Is this list too long? Can I cross a few things off?”

    Create a short list from your big list – just three items (post-it notes are good for this). Then put away your long list. When you’ve completed those three items, create a new list of three from your long list.

    To sum up

    During times of chaos, lists are your friends. Reach out and use this fabulous tool to lighten your mental load. You don’t need any special skills or talent to do this. Lists are for everyone.