How to mentally and physically prepare yourself for an exam

Exams are an intense experience.

This means you need to prepare yourself mentally and physically for them.

You can work so hard to memorise large quantities of information for an exam, but if you’re not mentally and physically prepared, all that hard work can sadly go to waste.

When it comes time to take your exams, you have to relate to yourself as a professional athlete. Leading up to the day of the big performance (i.e. the exam), you need to eat nutritious food, be in the right frame of mind, manage your nerves, and allow your body to rest. These simple things can make all the difference to your exam performance.

You may be thinking “But isn’t this just common sense?”

It is! But creating healthy habits takes time and practice.

It’s one thing to intellectually know you should be eating well but it’s another thing altogether to incorporate healthy meals and snacks into your lifestyle.

I see a lot of students drinking energy drinks, getting very little sleep, and eating highly processed foods in the days leading up to exams. I have to admit, there was a time when I engaged in these behaviours too. I can tell you from personal experience, this is a recipe for mediocre grades and a miserable existence.

Here are my top 10 tips to prevent burnout and boost exam performance:

1. Prioritise sleep

Sleep is critical to the learning process, exam performance, and wellbeing. Yet it’s usually the first thing students sacrifice to get more study done.

If you miss two hours of sleep each night for a week, the cognitive effects are as bad as going without sleep for two days straight!

Studies have also found that if you stay awake for 18 hours straight that’s like having a blood alcohol level of 0.05. In other words, it’s like being legally drunk. Your ability to focus, think, and learn will be seriously impaired.

You can’t adapt to getting less sleep. As adolescents, you need about 9-10 hours of sleep per night to be as alert as possible when you wake up.

If that feels unachievable, try to just get an extra 15 minutes of sleep tonight. Gradually increase this each night until you reach your target.

2. Incorporate movement breaks into your study sessions

Often students stop exercising when they start preparing for exams. They think “I don’t have time to exercise!”. It’s as if they think they must spend every moment studying. Don’t fall into this trap.

Movement is your friend when it comes to studying for exams.

Research shows engaging in regular physical movement will help you to study more effectively. Firstly, it’s a great way to relieve stress and release feel good chemicals. Secondly, it gets the blood flowing more efficiently to your brain, which can give you a cognitive boost.

One study found students who engaged in 5 minute movement breaks every 17 minutes during a lecture retained more information and could focus better.

Every time you engage in a short movement break, you’re enhancing your study sessions.

3. Eat a healthy breakfast

Research has found that students who skip breakfast experience a decrease in cognitive performance and alertness compared to students who eat breakfast.

Eating a nutritious breakfast will give you a cognitive boost before an exam. It will also help you to feel fuller for longer, stabilise your mood, and give you plenty of energy to get through the exam.

Here are some healthy breakfast ideas:

  • Muesli or porridge with nuts and fresh fruit (e.g., berries)
  • Wholemeal toast with a variety of toppings (e.g., baked beans, tomatoes, and avocado) and a piece of fruit
  • A healthy homemade smoothie (click here for my brain boosting smoothie recipe)
  • Breakfast smoothie recipe

    4. Drink plenty of water

    Your brain requires adequate hydration to function properly. Drinking water ensures that your brain receives the necessary fluids to perform tasks efficiently, such as retaining information and problem-solving.

    Take regular sips of water as you study. It’s a good idea to have a glass of water or a reusable drink bottle within arms reach.

    You may even want to create a tiny habit to remind yourself to engage in this simple behaviour (e.g., “After I finish answering a practice exam question, I will take a sip of water”).

    5. Remember, your teachers want you to do well

    Many years ago, I started thinking that my teachers and lecturers were out to get me. I thought they would mark me down wherever they got the chance. As a result of this distorted thinking, I became too scared to write anything in one of my first tests at law school. After receiving a terrible grade (5%), my brother said to me:

    “Remember sis, your teachers want you to do well. They will try to give you marks wherever they can. It’s in their best interest to do so.”

    Don’t worry about writing a perfect answer. If you’re unsure, be brave and still write something down. Even if it’s just a few dot points, it’s better than nothing. You may not get any marks for it, but your teachers won’t take marks off.

    Just remember, most of the time your teachers are on your side and they want you to succeed. When you do well, it makes them look good.

    6. Focus on what you know

    Chances are there will always be something that you could have studied more thoroughly come the day of your exam. But on the morning of an exam, you can’t do much about that, so there’s no point worrying. Worrying will just deplete your finite energy, which you need to conserve for the exam.

    Instead of worrying, try saying this to yourself before each exam:

    “I now know so much more than I did before. I’ll be able to answer many questions in this exam.”

    Telling yourself this positive micro-thought will allow you to enter the exam in a calm and confident frame of mind.

    7. Avoid things and people that trigger anxiety

    It’s normal to feel a bit nervous before an exam. But there are certain things and people that can push your anxiety levels into dangerous territory and impair your exam performance.

    For example, coffee and energy drinks will skyrocket your stress levels. Similarly, hanging out with people who have a lot of nervous energy and are venting about the exam (“I’m going to fail!” and “I hardly studied!”) are going to leave you feeling distracted and a little jangled.

    Before the exam, do your best to isolate yourself from these people. If you’re worried about offending someone who is venting to you, you could say “I’m sorry but I really need to do some last minute cramming”. Then proceed to pull out your notes and pretend to read them.

    8. Mentally disconnect from the exam when it’s over

    How many times have you stayed back after an exam to talk to your friends about what you put for each question? Have you ever felt terrible after doing this?

    It can be reassuring to know that you wrote the same answer as your friends. But if you find out that you wrote something completely different, you may start to second guess yourself. If you have another four or five exams to go, this may throw you off your game.

    This is why I don’t recommend engaging in a postmortem of the exam until you get your results/exam paper back.

    When you walk out of the exam room, tell yourself:

    “That exam is over. There’s nothing I can do to change how I went. It’s time to move on!”.

    You could imagine yourself locking the exam in a box and throwing it off a cliff or rolling it up and stuffing it in a bottle and throwing it out to sea. The point is you need to mentally disconnect from that exam and focus on studying for the next one.

    9. Engage in the Box Breathing Technique when you get stuck

    If you come across a question that you’re not sure how to answer, stop for a moment and take a few deep breaths (in for the count of 4 and out for the count of 4).

    A simple breath activity you can try is the Box Breathing Technique. This involves imagining yourself breathing along the sides of a box (breathing in for the count of four on one side, out for the count of four on the next side, etc). Repeat this 2-3 times. Then take a look at the question again.

    If you are still unsure how to answer the question, move on to another question.

    The worst thing you can do is panic (remember, stress impairs your ability to think and recall information).

    By engaging in Box Breathing, you can help yourself to remain in a calm and stable state.

    10. Dealing with writer’s cramp

    Many of us are familiar with writer’s cramp. This can be caused by gripping onto your pen too tightly. Try loosening your grip a little.

    Alternatively, experiment with a range of different pens. Some biros require you to press down hard on the page to make a mark, but not gel pens. The ink just flows onto the page!

    The reality is, even with a good gel pen, your elbow will start to hurt at some point if you’re taking a 3 hour exam. When it does start to hurt, have a rest for a few seconds (yes, you have time to do this). Stretch your arm out. Shake it a little.

    Treat each exam like a mountain hike rather than a 100 metre sprint. Resting for a few moments here and there will be time well spent and will enhance your overall performance.

    To sum up

    These simple strategies can help to elevate your exam performance. My advice is to start small. Even if your exams are several weeks away, select one or two of these ideas and start testing them out today. At first, the strategies will require a bit of mental effort. But like anything in life, if you persevere they’ll become second nature to you and they’ll just be things you do without even thinking.

    Want to learn more exam strategies? Click here to download a free copy of 70 ways to ace your exams.

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    the control test

    I’ve developed this story that I’m not the world’s best bag packer.

    Every holiday, I tend to pack either too much or too little.

    At the start of the Easter long weekend, I was overwhelmed by the task of packing for a four-day trip.

    To be fair, other things were on my mind, such as the chaotic state of the world and the chaos within my home (i.e., the mess I would be returning to).

    I know what you might be thinking…

    “Stop your whinging, Jane. What a privilege to be able to pack your bag to go away!”

    Indeed, it is! An absolute privilege.

    Yet, rather than experiencing gratitude, anxious thoughts swirled through my mind.

    “Have I packed enough socks and undies?”

    “Do I have enough food to avoid going into the crowded shops?”

    “Will the traffic be bad?”

    “Will my husband insist on getting hot chips at the Service Station?”

    “What books should I take?”

    My worries

    Among these packing questions, one stood out: what books should I take? This question weighed heavily on my mind and here’s why.

    When it comes to packing books, I tend to go overboard.

    I overestimate how much I can read in a single weekend. I’ll weigh down my backpack with several heavy books, only to find that I don’t end up reading any of them. Ugh.  

    You’d think more books equal more reading. Wrong.

    More books mean more choice. And more choice usually results in decision fatigue and overwhelm.

    Determined to change my usual approach this holiday, I told myself it was time to be in reality. I gave myself strict orders: I could only pack what I could realistically read in the time I would be away. That was one book.

    Fifteen minutes before I was due to set off, I selected this book: Reasons not to worry – How to be stoic in chaotic times by Brigid Delaney.

    Book - Reasons Not to Worry

    I’d purchased this book several years ago, and for whatever reason, I stopped reading it after just 20 pages. I wasn’t ready for it. And when it comes to reading certain books, it’s all about timing. Every book has its time.

    Now, I was finally ready to listen to what these Stoic philosophers had to say about living well in times of chaos.

    How to live when the world is falling apart

    We are living in unstable times. I don’t need to lay out what’s going on. You’ve seen the headlines.

    It’s easy to feel powerless and unsure about what to do.

    Where should you focus your limited time and energy during chaotic times? How can you focus and study for an exam when the future feels uncertain?

    This is why I felt open to wisdom of the ancient Stoics. The Stoics, such as Seneca, Epictetus, and Marcus Aurelius, had many great ideas for dealing with the challenges of everyday life and for facing life’s disappointments with grace. This is what I desperately needed!

    On my trip, I read most of Reasons not to worry—a breakthrough in itself! Even more powerful, however, were the book’s ideas, which left me feeling calmer.

    In this blog, I want to share the most powerful idea I learnt from the Stoics: the control test—a tool that helps you focus on what you can control and let go of what you can’t.

    Running things through the control test

    The Stoics believed the secret to happiness and tranquillity was to focus on the things you can control and not worry about the rest. As Bridget Delaney writes in Reasons not to worry:

    “The step the Stoics took first, before taking action, was to run everything through a basic test. Called the ‘control test’ or the Dichotomy of Control, the Stoics assessed what they could and could not control about a situation, and focused their attention on areas they could control.”

    Delaney provides the following useful image to illustrate the control test.

    Image from Reasons Not to Worry

    This image shows that you have full control over three things: 1) your character; 2) your reactions; and 3) how you treat others.

    If something relates to one of these three things, it’s within your control and you can take action.

    Stoic philosopher Epictetus was a strong proponent of the control test. He believed knowing what you can control and what you can’t was the key to living a tranquil life. In his manual The Art of Living, he lays out what’s within our personal control:

    “Within our control are our opinions, aspirations, desires, and the things that repel us. These areas are quite rightly our concern, because they are directly subject to our influence. We always have a choice about the content and character of our inner lives.”

    In contrast, what other people think and do is out of our control. Epictetus believed that if we focus on trying to control or change these things, we will torment ourselves and waste our precious time and energy.

    Whats within your control and isn't

    Applying the control test to my everyday life

    Thinking back to the start of the Easter long weekend, I can see that if I had run my anxious thoughts through the control test, I would have felt a lot more relaxed.

    Instead of telling myself, “You’re so bad at packing!”, I could have viewed packing as a skill, as something I could work at becoming better at.

    For my next trip, I could make a packing list. I could also start packing my bag the night before or even two nights before. Those things are within my control.

    It’s also within my control to lower my expectations about packing. Is it really the end of the world if I don’t pack enough socks and undies? Couldn’t I just wash them if I run out?

    As for concerns about the traffic being bad, this is out of my control! I can’t control how many cars are on the road or how fast they’re going. However, what I can control is my own driving ability (e.g., sticking strictly to the speed limit and taking regular breaks to recharge).

    What about my husband buying overpriced hot chips at the Service Station? It is within my control to encourage him to buy a healthier snack, but ultimately, it’s my husband’s choice. If he wants hot chips, I can’t stop him. But it is within my control not to eat those hot chips.

    Since reading Reasons not to worry, I’ve been applying the control test to my life several times a day. When I notice I’m feeling worried, upset, or unhappy about something, I ask myself, “Is this within my control?”

    This simple practice has helped me to chill out, conserve my energy, and be less of a control freak. As a result, I feel better, and so does the rest of my family.

    As Delaney writes:

    “Used well, the control test will change how you use your energy and where you place your care and attention. Your energy should be focused on the first part of the equation: doing the thing well. And you should not direct any energy or worry to things out of your control, such as the outcome or people’s response to what you do, because that is wasted energy. You will only end up with your tranquillity disturbed”.

    How can the control test help you prepare for tests and exams?

    The control test can help us prepare effectively for tests and exams. You can’t control the way your grades are scaled, the exact questions you’ll be asked on the exam, what your exam timetable will look like, or if you’ll have back-to-back exams. Those things are externals, so the Stoics would say don’t waste your energy worrying about them.

    But what you can control is how much you prepare for your exams, how much study you do, how much sleep you get, the strategies you use to learn the information, whether you refer to the syllabus, and how focused you are as you study.

    How you prepare is within your control. And the more prepared you are, the better you will do in your exams.

    Should you worry about the state of the world?

    Does the Control Test mean you shouldn’t try to help others in your community or push for environmental, social, or political change?

    Not at all.

    Delaney writes:

    “. . . Stoics were not passive people. Historically they were people of action: political leaders, emperors and soldiers. But they knew that even if they trained hard, acted with integrity, built alliances and put in a lot of effort, they couldn’t control the outcome. They could only control their own character, own actions (and reactions) and how they treated others.”

    To sum up

    The control test can help you to stop stressing about things that are out of your control and worrying about what other people think. In the spirit of the Stoics, focus your energy on doing your best work, being the best version of yourself, and treating people with kindness.

    My first car was a dilapidated Suzuki Swift.  

    But just to be clear – this car wasn’t in bad shape when I first got it. I turned this car into a jalopy through neglect and ignoring basic warning signs.

    Whenever I gave my friends a lift in this car, I remember that they always looked visibly uncomfortable. They’d say with a nervous laugh:

    “Jane, what’s that strange rattling sound?”

    “Why is there a red warning light on your dashboard?”

    I wasn’t fussed about the red light or the strange rattling sound.

    Somehow, I’d missed the adulting lesson on basic car maintenance.

    For many years, I never bothered to get my car serviced. I drove it to the point where it rattled and shook violently, the engine would cut out while driving, and the brakes squealed at a painfully high pitch.

    It got to the point where I could no longer ignore these problems, but by then, it was too late. My car was beyond repair and could only be salvaged for scrap metal.

    I’m embarrassed to share this, as that’s no way to treat a car that gets you from A to B and uses the Earth’s finite resources. But stay with me because there’s an important point I want to make, and it’s this. . .

    The way that I treated my first car is symbolic of how many people treat their bodies, especially when they’re young.

    When I was younger, I engaged in several unhealthy lifestyle practices. Whilst I never smoked, took drugs, or consumed alcohol, I ate huge amounts of processed junk food (I didn’t know how to cook).

    I also frequently sacrificed sleep to pull all-nighters to complete my assignments (I struggled with procrastination).

    My body seemed resilient. It appeared capable of handling the shocks. But over time, I started feeling tired and rundown. Still, I kept pushing myself like my old car. The only time I could rest was when I got sick.

    These days, everything’s quite different.

    I am physically unable to thrash my body around like an old jalopy.

    Something as simple as consuming too much salt or sugar can send my brain spiralling out of control.

    I was reminded of this a couple of weeks ago when I visited a friend in hospital. Because I was spending a lot of time at the hospital, my usual routines of grocery shopping and cooking from scratch were disrupted.

    But then to make matters worse, I was given $80 worth of vouchers to spend at the hospital cafeteria. I thought, “How bad can hospital cafeteria food be?”.

    It turns out really bad.

    Cheese kranskys (sausages), heaps of salty hot chips, deep-fried chicken, and soft drinks were the main options at this hospital cafeteria.

    Unhealthy food seemed completely normalised in this hospital environment. My jaw dropped when I saw a patient order not just one but five cheese kransky sausages!

    In this hospital setting, I also started to eat poorly. It was on my third day of eating hot chips from the hospital cafeteria when I noticed that these chips weren’t doing me any favours. I was feeling off my game.

    So I decided enough was enough. I gave the remaining hospital food vouchers to a homeless man who was hanging around the cafeteria, desperate for a feed. It was back to home cooked meals for me!

    Who would have thought some hot chips could wreak so much havoc with my brain and body?

    This greasy processed hospital food had a ripple effect on the rest of my life. I slept badly, which impacted my ability to run the next morning (my joints hurt). I felt resistance to using my treadmill desk because everything felt much harder than usual. Since I was moving less, I was more distracted.

    I know all this might sound a bit dramatic, especially to those of us who enjoy a few hot chips (e.g., my husband). Given my friend was in a hospital bed and couldn’t walk, I am fully aware of how lucky I am to be able to run in the first place (even with sore joints).

    The point I’m trying to make is this . . .

    I know what it feels like to feel really good, and I value that feeling. When I feel good, everything feels easier.

    I also know that small decisions, like eating too many hot chips or staying up late, can add up and take their toll on your mind and body. These tiny decisions can have a big impact on the way you feel.

    When I was younger, I could eat whatever I wanted and still feel pretty good. Sometimes I’d feel a bit off, but not in a noticeable way.

    As Dr Randy J Paterson states in his book How to Be Miserable in Your Twenties:

    “In your twenties, some people can do practically anything to their bodies, experience no immediate physical consequences, and feel emotionally more or less well. Random sleep cycle, sedentary lifestyle, lousy diet, 90 percent of the day staring at screen, binge-drinking, isolation, the works. The body doesn’t completely fall apart, and the mind, while not thrilled, hangs on.

    Later on, the effect is more immediate. Live exactly the same way at thirty-five, at forty-five, and things don’t go so well. Take a middle-aged car and drive it aggressively down jolting roads, loaded to the max, old oil clogging the engine, and it’s not going to last long. The baseline mood at forty-with no maintenance, no exercise, no dietary adjustment, no stability, and no social life- is misery. ”

    Like a car, the human body requires regular basic maintenance. I see this basic maintenance as a collection of small behaviours that leave me feeling calm, grounded, and focused.

    Here are a few things I need to do to keep myself running smoothly:

    • Engage in high-intensity exercise every morning
    • Limit my intake of salt and refined sugar
    • Be in bed by 9.30pm each night
    • Stay off social media and limit my time looking at screens
    • Give myself the right fuel (i.e., eat lots of plants and wholefoods and drink plenty of water)
    • Minimise my consumption of processed foods
    • Connect with friends and family
    • Avoid sitting for long periods of time
    • Go outside and spend time in nature
    • Give myself fun rest breaks
    • Try to do one thing at a time (multitasking scrambles my brain)

     

    Every now and then, I’ll abandon these behaviours. I’ll have a day where I eat and do whatever I like. I’ll order takeaway, sit on the couch and binge-watch a series until late at night. I usually pay for it the next day, but it also gives me a better appreciation of these healthy practices and what they do for my body and mind.

    It’s all about tuning in and noticing how certain things make you feel. For example, when I was in my mid-20s, I noticed every time I ate deep-fried chicken, I experienced sharp stomach pains.

    That was like the red warning light on my car dashboard going off in my body. But instead of ignoring it, I paid close attention. Eventually, I decided it wasn’t worth the pain. So I stopped buying greasy deep-fried chicken and eventually went plant-based, which immediately improved my mental and physical health.

    Final thoughts

    There’s no doubt that modern life can be hectic and stressful. When you’re rushing from one thing to another, it’s easy to overlook the basics and ignore the warning signs.

    I’m not proud of how I treated my first car, but I learnt from the experience. Now I make sure I get my car serviced regularly. This saves me time, money, and stress in the long run.

    Similarly, we need to pay attention to the way in which we look after ourselves. By dedicating time, energy, and attention to the small things that make us feel better, our experience of the present moment becomes richer. As longevity researcher Dan Buettner says, “You can add years to your life and life to your years”.

     

    Image Credit

    Suzuki Swift 1.3 GTi 1990” by RL GNZLZ is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0. (used in image 1)

    Scrap yard 22l3” by Snowmanradio at English Wikipedia (Original text: snowmanradio) is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0. (used in image 2)

    KFC Wicked Wings” by avlxyz is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0. (used in image 5)

    When you’re feeling worried, it can be hard to learn.

    I experienced this firsthand when I was an exchange student living abroad. When I was 16, I travelled to the south of Italy to live in a small village called Spinazzola.

    This had been my dream, and my parents forked out over $2,000 to make it come true (thanks, Mum and Dad!).,

    I wanted to make the most of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so I set off with an ambitious goal to come back fluent in Italian.

    Before I left for Italy, several people had told me that I would pick up the language “just like that!”. I was told that I’d be fluent in no time.

    I took their words as gospel truth.

    So I became concerned when, after just a few days in Italy, I wasn’t speaking like the locals. I thought, “Why am I not fluent in Italian by now? What’s going on? Is something wrong with me?”

    Panic and worry set in. I became stuck in an anxiety loop. Thoughts rolled through my head, such as:

    “Am I learning the language fast enough?”

    “Am I going to come back knowing enough?”

    “How will I compare to the other Australian exchange students? What if my Italian sucks?

    This anxiety spilled over into almost every amazing experience I found myself in: a trip to the local pizzeria with my new friends from school, family dinners, and day trips with other exchange students.

    To counteract my fears, I doubled down on my study, carrying a mini pocket Italian dictionary with me everywhere I went (this was well before mobile phones and Google Translate existed).

    About a month into my student exchange experience, out of the blue, a young man snatched the pocket dictionary out of my hands.

    This man was called Gianluca. He was my host sister’s 18-year-old cousin who had travelled with his parents from Milan to spend Christmas with my host family.

    Gianluca was a character. He had wild, voluminous curly hair, a cheeky smile, and a sense of style.

    Christmas lunch with my host family in Italy – Can you spot Gianluca?

    Gianluca was also a slightly arrogant man. He would say whatever was on his mind, seemingly without caring if he upset or offended others.

    For example, one of my first interactions with Gianluca was when I sat down on a stool, thereby exposing my white socks. He gasped loudly and said in Italian:

    “Jane Christine, white socks with black shoes is a fashion crime! No, No, No!”

    I took his words very seriously and have never repeated this fashion faux pas.

    But it was the moment when Gianluca snatched the dictionary out of my hands that I remember more than anything else. This moment had a profound impact on the rest of my exchange experience, and I am deeply grateful to him for that.

    Here’s how the situation unfolded . . .

    It was late in the evening. A group of us had been talking and playing Italian card games. Remember, these were simpler times (there were very few mobile phones back in those days and no social media).

    I was struggling to follow the conversation in Italian, so I picked up my dictionary to look up a word, but Gianluca stopped me. He grabbed hold of the dictionary and said:

    “Put the dictionary down. You don’t need this! Just be here in this moment!”

    Gianluca was trying to tell me to relax. To stop hiding behind my dictionary. To stop trying so hard to learn Italian.

    He was right. Sometimes, when you try too hard and are too fixated on achieving a future goal, it can get in the way of actually doing what you need to do (in my case, learning Italian).

    Oliver Burkeman writes about this in his book Meditations for Mortals. He argues that there are benefits in not trying so hard. He writes:

    “The less I’m trying to get something out of an experience, the more I find I can get into it, and the more I can be present for other people involved.”

    Those first few weeks in Italy, I had been trying too hard to master the language and get the most out of my student exchange experience. I was trying to frantically get to a place where I could tick the ‘Fluent in Italian’ box.

    I can now see clearly that by trying so hard to learn Italian, I was sacrificing my enjoyment in the present moment. I was also undermining my ability to learn Italian.

    Taking the pressure off myself

    You’ve probably heard the phrase “La Dolce Vita”. This directly translates to “The Sweet Life”.

    But what it means is a relaxed, easy-going approach to life. An approach where you enjoy the simple things: a hearty, simple meal shared with your family, a reviving nap in the middle of the day, and an evening stroll (‘passeggiatta’) down the main street with friends.

    Whenever I picked up my dictionary, which was frequently during those first few weeks in Italy, I embodied the polar opposite of “La Dolce Vita”. I transformed a potentially fun, rich moment into an anxiety-fuelled study session.

    I also took myself out of the present moment. And effective learning (and living) is all about being present.

    Gianluca’s words – “Put the dictionary down!” – hit home. That evening, I put my pocket dictionary away and gave up on trying to master Italian in a day. I took the pressure off myself and relaxed into the experience.

    Soon after, I asked my host mother Rosa if I could join a local exercise class. I knew that movement always made me feel better. It relaxed me. I was so happy when Mamma Rosa agreed.

    At this class, I’d slip on some special socks over my shoes and slide from side to side on a slippery mat (a slide board).

    I took this crazy exercise class with a bunch of middle-aged Italian women wearing spandex and leg warmers (it was Winter). Occasionally, someone would lose control on their slide board and fall to the ground.

    For 60 minutes, I was able to get out of my head and get grounded in my body. This exercise class, as strange as it was, made all the difference. It relieved my anxiety and fears straightaway. It calmed my mind and made me feel like I was doing okay.

    Ironically, once I felt calmer and less pressured to ‘learn Italian’, I started to pick things up. Learning the language became easier and easier. It didn’t happen in an instant. But it was happening. Slowly but surely, my language skills improved.

    When I came back to Australia, I hadn’t mastered Italian (can you ever really master anything?), but I could hold a solid conversation with my nonna in Australia.

    The whole student exchange experience fundamentally changed me. I learnt so much more than just Italian.

    So, what did I learn from my time in Italy?

    I learnt the power of a good nap after lunch (strictly enforced by my host mother), the importance of connection and community, and that if you’re having pasta, you must mop up the last bit of sauce with some bread (this Italian tradition is called ‘scarpetta’).

    But I also learned not to try so hard. Instead of rushing to get to a specific destination, it’s okay to just explore, learn, and grow at your own pace.

    Image Credit

    Mappa ferr Spinazzola-Barletta” (Used in Image 1) by Arbalete is licensed under CC BY-SA 3.0